That quote framed in my parents' guest bathroom

The Narrow Way Blog | September 16, 2026

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This morning in prayer I came across the old familiar, sappy verse from Corinthians 13.

You know the one.

I saw it most days growing up.

Framed, with uber eccentric, feminine font.

Something kind of like this.

Well, once again the proof of scripture as "living and effective" took place this morning. This verse hits me like a ton of bricks. Bricks that are not framed, uber eccentric, and dainty. They are hard, impactful, and leave me feeling like bricks are better suited for building rather than being hit with. Which is exactly what this scripture is meant to do. Build me up. However, I seem to think I belong in the exact place where God wants me to build. "Wait, you want me to use the bricks that you are handing me and build up your kingdom and not my ego?"

Like many times we read in the scriptures, moments of sudden disobedience and self-reliance seem laughable from the aerial view we get in being a "reader" of scripture. Fortunately, God is writing our story and does not leave out our own epic fails from the adventure.

God has an enormously big and beautiful plan for your life. You might be stuck in the same old, same old way of operating day to day. But let me tell you a secret that I have learned the easy way and also the very hard way... You don't have to keep doing things the same way.

You have this wonderful thing called free choice. You can literally make a million choices a day, some conscious, some subconscious. We choose not only what we do, but how we do it.

I microwave my food still. And when I do, I change the power to 70%, because I don't want my food to go from cold to nuclear and blow up everywhere. Not many people do that, but we have a free choice that enables us to.

One choice that 1 Corinthians 13 can help us make is how we love. How we love relates directly to what love is. I love (will the good of another) with patience, kindness. I personally struggle with, "does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable." Woof. Gets me every time.

This is not my microwave

Renewal of the Mind

The journey toward real freedom is more possible today than it ever has been. We also live in a world where various forms of slavery, impulsivity, and comfort are readily available. It's full of "polarizing possibilities," for better or worse.

A battle for a life of virtue can seem overwhelming. Where do I begin? Begin by being aware. We become aware most readily in stillness and silence. Where can I find that? In prayer. I don't have time to pray. Ok, well let's make time. I'm too busy... or, interiorly, I just don't want to be quiet and still. That's a scary place. Ok, well admit that it's unwanted. Also, understand that if our goal is to follow Jesus and become saints, an essential element of that is prayer. Communication with God is a united awareness of our relationship. It's real. It's dynamic.

It is in prayer that we begin the renewal of the mind. Humble surrender and vulnerability is the posture that will be most fruitful. Sometimes prayer is difficult. The most important part is to show up. Then to be consistent.

In our cravings we are seeking escape from shame, from discomfort, from pain. The thought of leaving our bad habits can seem impossible. We don't know how to operate outside of the glass case emotion we've built for ourselves.

Be open to the idea there is more freedom than you can imagine right now. I know it seems crazy, but through the process of coaching, accountability, meetings, gathering emotional tools, and getting back your true voice, you will begin to find you again. The person God made you to be. Our minds were made to be free to love, and there is a way forward.

For some of you, this isn't abstract. It's the thing you think about every single day.

The Choice Is Not to Stop

You might be thinking, "this all sounds nice"... "but I still can't stop going to porn"... "it's almost automatic."

The choice we need to think about making is not the choice to stop looking at porn — we've tried that a thousand times. What can you do? Can you call someone each day? Yes. Let's start there. Can you call a friend each day and let him know how you're doing? Can you leave a voicemail if he isn't answering? That is something you can control. Your behavior might be out of control, but we are going to begin by being aware of what is going on inside, slowing down the mind and body, and accomplishing achievable goals day by day.

You spent years getting to this place of addiction; it's going to take time getting out. Have patience, because love is patient and kind. So have some kindness for yourself. You are worth your recovery.

Love keeps no record of wrongs. Read that again.

The enemy of your soul keeps a scoreboard on a jumbotron in your mind of how many times you've messed up, but the Lord does not. He knows you. The enemy accuses. The Lord embraces.

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Want help building a daily plan of surrender, prayer, and accountability? That's exactly what we do at The Narrow Way. Reach out at matt.nrway@gmail.com or book a free consultation at nrway.org